“TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE”

By Shirley M. Carolan

January has turned out to be a month of unexpected changes and endings, some good and some questionable. Heretofore, I have been able to accept change more quickly and perhaps more graciously when it’s been something that I have initiated. But suddenly I find myself in the midst of changes and endings that I did not foresee or plan. Consequently, my reactions have not been as smooth as I would like.

Journaling has come to my rescue and has helped me to sort out what’s really important to me and why and how I choose to live my life. I’ve had to sort out fact from fiction; ego from reality, to honor my emotions without falling into the victim trap.

I remember shortly after I moved to southern California and was living in a nice neighborhood and nice apartment, with bird’s eye view of the Pacific ocean, and I was suddenly slapped with an $80 dollar a month rent increase. This put me in a totally different bracket and I had to rethink my vow never to own real estate again! As a result, I started looking at homes for sale. I ended up buying the small doll’s house I live in today, which quite literally has turned out to be a cash cow!

The lessons I learned in 1999 were invaluable and apply today! I learned never to say “Never” again. I learned that silver and even gold linings can happen when change is forced upon me. Just because it is a change brought by others, rather than something I have planned, doesn’t mean I can’t survive it and benefit from it. I don’t have to play the victim role either!

Relationship endings are a little harder to swallow, especially when I’ve not planned them. The sudden and inevitable void is apparent and the pain is equally disturbing. I’m also learning to trust my own judgment here and as Shakespeare said “To Thine Own Self Be True!”

While I may not be out of the woods yet, as far as enforced change, I certainly have cause to reflect on all the good things that transpired, and I am open to see what the universe has in store for me now! January has certainly started things off with a bang!

Shirley M. Carolan, ATMG
Artist ● Speaker ● Writer
artistwithaflair@att.net
Phone/Fax: 760-732-0663
http://www.angelscross.blogspot.com
http://www.smcarolan.blogspot.com


Copyright© 2008 by Shirley Carolan. All rights reserved. To reprint any portion of this article simply contact Shirley Carolan at artistwithaflair@att.net.